The Right Regrets

"Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets."

-Arthur Miller

I had the chance to spend some time last weekend with two of my girlfriends from college.  It is always fun to get together and reminisce about the “old times”.  We got to talking about things that we wished we had done while we were at school.  And we all agreed on two things.  We wished we had gone to more basketball games (we went to a lot…but when you attend school like KU missing any is shameful).  And, we regretted not joining a sorority. 

I spent the next few days really thinking about that last one.  When I was a freshman, the idea of living with that many girls just didn't appeal to me.  I think I probably lacked the confidence that it takes to thrive in that environment.  I started wishing that I could go back, knowing what I know now, and relive those days.  Take those missed opportunities.  I thought about all of the friendships I could have cultivated, the missed networking opportunities.  There was a whole side of college life that I never really tapped in to. 

But, then I started to think about what that really means.  Would I still be living in Kansas?  Would that networking have lead me to take a job elsewhere?  How different would my life be?  If I had changed even one little thing about college, then I probably wouldn't have been at the Westlake Golf Course the fateful day that two high school acquaintances struck up a conversation.  Because that day was the real beginning of my life.  Not a sorority pledge day or formal dance.  It was the day that the door opened to being a wife and a mother. 

Those are the roles that most define me.  Sure, I am still a daughter, sister, friend, and so many other things...but being a good mom and a good wife is what life is all about for me.  I can't imagine those titles not being at the top of my list. 

If that “could have been” was a “what was”…I wouldn't have this

Or this…

Or this…

This is my life now, in all of its glory.  Those missed opportunities lead me to marrying a wonderful man.  We have two of most amazing little boys.  Its not perfect...but its ours.  Every day is a challenge, with lots of ups, downs, and bumps along the way.  But you know what I realized?  I have no regrets.  NONE. Zilch. Zero. Zip.  Because this life is SO much better than “what could have been.”